belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
