Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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