I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
