You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
