are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
