i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
