Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
