Tell her she can't have a vagina
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
