You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Ladies don't puke and tell
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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