well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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