Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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