pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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