ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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