i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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