He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
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