just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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