He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
kristin has been a bad kristin
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
