did you get engaged???
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Randomize