hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
