I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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