So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
