so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
