I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize