If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
