glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
