if only i could text you this smell
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
