try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Randomize
