How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My pussy is not your playground.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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