what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
