I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
