I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
the liver wants what the liver wants
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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