In America we eat man semen.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
