sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
