Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
