I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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