Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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