Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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