You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
