We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Randomize
