Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
