The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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