It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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