exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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