I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize