I just cut my nipple shaving
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
