Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize