I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
