How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
