The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
