fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
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